Jenkins & Moreno's Sidekick

Loser packs
What team of losers do you belong on?
Sidekick background

Starting Roster

Presale Signup

Hello, losers!

Signup to receive first access to our sale coming soon.

Let’s not beat around the bush, we have amusing characters, and you have disposable income. We can either track your keystrokes (we are doing it right now on one of our post-revolution computing consoles inside our Siberian troll farm!) or you can save us the trouble and give us your info. In exchange, we will not share embarrassing pictures we just scrubbed from your poorly hidden “NSFW” folder and you will get sneak previews of new characters*, upcoming land inside Metroville** and the chance at your very own cyber-Sidekick living quarters modeled from the very best Siberian pre-fab town homes we could find

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* When we can be bothered to draw them, or when we run out of money for recreational drugs

** A fictional city modeled on typical American town, like Cleveland, Wisconsin

Roadmap

Greetings, Sidekick funsters! Take a look below at the personal identity theft fun stuff we have planned for you as we roll out our Sidekick money-making cash cow onto your decadent western internet this year! These are our plans for 2021!* Check it out!

    • Sneak previews, sketchy variants, puzzles, prizes and community building… because we value your data and would never share it with Kremlin officials or the dark web! Let us wow you with our understanding of American toilet humor!

    • Win free NFT's? You betcha!

    • Full project release! Send us your cyber-money you have been hoarding to pay for groceries in event of new COVID variant! Don’t waste your money hiring a hitman on the dark web, waste it on Sidekick instead!

    • Land Sale! Want to be a decadent land baron? Who doesn’t! Stake your claim to a piece of Metroville and grab yourself a living space in “the town that makes Prypiat look like a seaside resort!” First come, first served, kids!

    • Play the game! You wanted Sidekick: the movie and we couldn’t afford it! You wanted Sidekick: the resort destination and it fell into the Caribbean Sea during the Fyre festival! Because we are persistent… here’s Sidekick: the game! It’s fun and educational, too! An NFT game! What could possibly go wrong?

    • Sergei, do we tell them about the stuff we hid in the smart contract? These crypto nerds will never know they have been hacked! Make sure you don’t accidentally include this note when the landing page goes live - Dmitri.